Dear Friends,
Listen… Are you listening?
When our children were much younger, getting them to listen wasn’t always easy, especially when there was conflict or danger or something upsetting. Listen to what I’m saying, we would say to them. And invariably, when we didn’t get the response we were looking for, we would resort to that line… Look at me. Depending on the circumstance, seeing eye to eye isn’t always a simple thing when it is accompanied by hurt or fear or, worse, shame. Then again, getting a child’s attention for safety’s sake is critical.
Listen… Are you listening?
We are all children at heart, and listening is not something that always comes easily, especially in this age of distraction. Screens and computers, phones and advertising occupy us. Earbuds and headphones buffer the world around us with music, podcasts and calls. We create our own little bubbles. I am discovering with the delicacies of aging that my hearing isn’t as good as it was. And listening isn’t always easy, especially when you don’t want to hear what is being said.
Last weekend, Mary and I joined the Congregational Development team and the Diocesan Volunteer Corps for a retreat at Hockley Valley. This annual conference gives opportunity for volunteers who serve as Canon 24 administrators, Parish Selection Committee consultants, Project Enabling and Monitoring Group members (and so many other groups!) to come together to learn, share ideas, worship, pray and enjoy each other’s company. This core group gives so much to the ministry and mission of the Church in our Diocese. We couldn’t possibly accomplish all that we do without them. Perhaps you might want to learn more about what they do. I would encourage you to speak to Elizabeth McCaffrey for more information.
This year’s speaker was Paul Kiss of Paul Kiss Consulting. He spent the morning inviting us to hone our skills at group facilitation and managing group dynamics. Some of us have been doing this kind of work for years, and some are just getting started. It’s one thing to facilitate a jovial community that gets along. It’s quite another when there may be underlying fears, conflict, danger and upset, which happens in church communities now and again. It’s into these situations that we are sent, two by two, like Jesus sent his disciples.
“Look for the bubbles,” Paul said to us. In the middle of a process, bubbles appear that give opportunity for conversation, transformation and change. They can be verbal, like emotional statements, changing the subject abruptly, and vague or indirect statements. Sometimes the bubbles are non-verbal, like body language or facial expressions, tone of voice, silence, eye contact or no eye contact and more. Listening for the below-the-surface teachings takes time, patience and trust. And isn’t that who we are called to be?
Listen… Are you listening?
Sunday by Sunday we listen to the readings for the day. At the close of each, the reader says, “Here endeth the lesson” or “The Word of the Lord” or “Hear what the Spirit is saying to the Church” (from Revelation) or an alternate. And the people respond with, “Thanks be to God.” How much do we hear? Through all the background noises of our lives that we bring with us to the pews, how much sinks in? Listening for the leading of the Spirit is a group endeavour when we worship together. We each hear something different as the Word resonates with us. I am always humbled to hear something I have never heard before in a Sunday text. I have been teaching and preaching the three-year lectionary for 38 years. I can’t tell you how many times a bubble appears in my listening. A word, a phrase, a thrust in the readings I have heard so often appears anew. I have never heard that before, I say.
Like a parent who needs to repeat again and again words of encouragement and warning, hope and support, love and compassion, mercy and forgiveness, it sometimes takes time for the Word to truly sink in – a lifetime, really.
Hear what the Spirit is saying to you.
Yours in Christ,
The Right Reverend Andrew Asbil
Bishop of Toronto
